Reading Body Language For Your Success

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In any face to face communication, the conveyor talks or writes while the recipient listens to or read the message. However, what they didn’t know is that actual verbal communication accounts to only around 10% (or even less) of the overall means of conveying a message.

However, there is another form of communication based on gestures or body movements which determine their true inner feelings and thoughts.This art of non-verbal communication is better known as body language.

Reading Body Language

Although spoken communication is a direct way to convey a message, it can be masked. By reading body language of the conveyor, you will understand the message in a truer sense or form. However, this depends on the interpretation of the recipient of the message.

With this in mind, it is important to familiarize yourself with this art of non-verbal communication. This art is the ability and skill of reading body language and to interpret the message correctly. Wrong interpretation may have drastic, dramatic implications.

Given the chance to come face to face to communicate with each other, you may be able to realize and verify the truthfulness of the message being conveyed.

Let’s pick a simple scenario to illustrate non-verbal communication. Let us say a former officemate of yours called you to propose a business partnership. This officemate is just one of your casual acquaintances. He’s not exactly a confidant whom you would treat as a close buddy. He asked that the two of you meet somewhere and you obliged.

So you wind up meeting him in a coffee shop. After the usual handshake (this is one type of body language), both of you took a seat and ordered coffee. After a few exchanges of pleasantries and recalling past incidences while you were still officemates, you touched on the subject of his business proposal. While in the process of presenting the proposed business, you occasionally interrupted him with questions that he readily answered. Subconsciously, while you continued to listen to his proposal, you kept touching your nose with your index finger, rubbing it once in a while as if covering the nose with your hand.

After the proposal has been made, he asked for your comment if his proposal merits your acceptance. He’s not asking for an immediate answer or decision if you’re interested or not, giving you enough time to study it. However, your first impression of the proposal was somewhat inclined on rejecting it. Your main reason was that you are not familiar with the line of business he’s proposing, and to go into unfamiliar business simply does not interest you.

But in spite of your negative perception of the proposal, you didn’t want to disappoint your former officemate, at least not at that moment. Before you gave the final word that you would seriously study the proposal, you made some initial comments about it to the tune that it may seem to merit your approval although it really didn’t. While you were making your comment, subconsciously and again, you touched your nose with one hand while talking.

It’s observed that during the entirety of your discussion, you frequently made one move, touching your nose. Are you aware that touching your nose is a gesture that means you’re not saying what you really felt or meant? Studies suggest that saying something while touching the nose is not reflective of what’s being said. In this case, rubbing the nose is tantamount to disapproval of the proposal presented to you.

Although there is no definite basis that this gesture is a sign of disapproval or disagreement or rejection, it has a high rate of probability. Only you know your real intention.

You may see this same gesture from other people if you were in the shoes of your officemate. But keep in mind that there may be other reasons. An itchy nose, a sinus that keeps bothering the listener, mannerism, halitosis on either the part of the conversationalist or the listener or both – anyone of these could be the real reason.

Keep in mind that interpretation of body language has a high probability rate but it may not necessarily be definite.

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Catching a Liar by Interpreting Body Language

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Reading body language to know if a person is lying applies not just to ordinary people but even to professionals, as well. The police use it to determine if the person is guilty of a certain wrongdoing or not, teachers employ it to find out if the child really has or hasn’t done his or her homework and parents apply it to find out if their teenagers really did go to a group study session as they said they would.

In the past, it seemed like reading body language to judge guilt may not have been in effect, at least in some cultures. Tribal groups of centuries back used to figure out if a native committed a crime using pain tests, such as dipping a hand in boiling water, walking on fiery coals, and others.

For instance, a native whose hand came out scalded after a dip in hot water is considered guilty at the time. Luckily, no such judging process exists anymore and we have the chance to disprove allegations by appearing in court and giving our statements. However, it may not be easy either, because it requires knowledge of reading body language.

How can you tell if the other person is lying through his teeth? There are several ways to tell. One is when the other person is unable to look you in the eye as he tells his lie. Thus, if you ask your partner if he has been cheating on you, you will know that something is amiss if he says he hasn’t but looks elsewhere while he says so.

Of course, there are people who have perfected the art of lying that the eye test does not always work. Other indicators of lying include restless hands (that is, he keeps touching his face, his arms, fixing his clothes, or tinkering with something), ill timing of gestures (that is, his body language seems to be off-kilter and awkward), or increased defensiveness. A person who has been accused of lying gets rather anxious as he tries to disprove the allegation.

Here’s another way you can also tell if the person is lying. When you suddenly shift to another topic, he also shifts to a more comfortable and relaxed state. A person who lies will want to avoid talking about the tense subject as much as possible, so he will most definitely try to stay at the lighter topic and try to expand on that so that you will forget about the original issue.

Most people have lied one way or another in their life. In fact, lying has become part of human nature. Sometimes we have to tell lies in order to avoid hurting somebody else. As the saying goes, what the person doesn’t know won’t hurt him. However, if discovering the truth is what you’re after, then these tips mentioned here will help you find out if you’re being duped or not.

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How to Speak Fluent Body Language

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You’ve probably heard the expressions before.. “Chin up, shoulders back,” “Keep your distance,” “Feet on the ground,” “Pain in the neck.” But have you ever wondered how they came about? It all has to do with Body Language.
Simply put, body language is the unspoken communication we all use in every face-to-face encounter with other human beings. You could say it’s more powerful than anything said aloud. Ninety-three per cent of our everyday communications is non-verbal. Only 7% has to do with words at all. You could be telling that other person much more with your body language than you would ever say in words.
Determining and regulating your own body language could well mean the difference when it comes to job interviews, networking meetings, banquets and business dinners, or even a social occasion, such as a date. Even trickier is learning to read and understand the other person’s body language.
So, you’re probably asking yourself, “How do I regulate my body language to give a true representation of how I feel when I interact with others?”
Start with the distance between you and the person with whom you’re speaking. If you get too close, people feel you’re in their face, or too pushy. Too far away, and you could be seen as standoffish.
The angle of your body is a dead giveaway to others. We tend to angle our body towards those people we find friendly or interesting, and angle away from those we feel are cold or unfriendly. Crossing your arms over your chest shows defensiveness. This posture says, “I’m closed off and keeping you out.”
Eye Contact is one of the most important ways to communicate with others. Looking them in the eye shows respect and interest. We’ve all experienced the person who looks constantly at their watch, or seems to be far away and not listening to us. Their body language says, “I have other places to be and other more interesting people to talk to than you.” Or the person that you know is not listening to what you’re saying, but instead is busy deciding what he/she will say next. Someone whose eyes are downcast, not looking you in the eye could be exhibiting signs of shyness, or it could be deceit. Someone who is lying to you will not look you in the eye.
The head position also says a lot. To show confidence or authority, simply keep your head level. This says, “Take me seriously, my words are important.” To show friendliness and interest in what the other person is saying, tilt your head slightly to one side or the other.
Mouth movements are easy clues to what the other person may be feeling. If they purse their lips or twist them, they could be thinking carefully about what you just said, or disagreeing with you, but holding back comment. You can certainly tell when someone is not pleased.
The handshake is extremely important in the communication with others. No one wants to shake a hand like a wet noodle; at the same time, a handshake needn’t be a contest of strength. It’s a handshake, not arm wrestling. Many people also don’t quite know what to do with their hands after the handshake, especially when meeting someone new. They tend to clasp their hands together, nervously, or fiddle with their jewelry.
Since we’re constantly sending out these powerful messages, it’s clear we should make an effort to learn more about what our bodies say to others. And learning what others are really saying to us is of paramount importance in our day-to-day communications.
So, chin up, shoulders back, keep your distance, head up, eyes sharp, don’t be pushy or standoffish, smile and shake that hand. You too can learn to speak fluent body language.

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How to Use Body Language to Drive Home a Point

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Many people know how important body language is in effective persuasion and communications. Thus, when you’re trying to emphasize a certain point or idea, simply saying how enthused you are with an event is not enough.

For instance, if a friend came to you and told you news about his promotion, saying something like “That’s wonderful news!” with a rather blank expression runs the risk of the other person getting the impression that you’re just pulling his leg and talking through your teeth.

In order to express your statements fully, you need to accompany your expressions and comments with the right kind of body language. According to experts on the art of body language interpretation, there are two things you should keep in mind.

First, to emphasize a point, you need to apply body language that is concurrent with the statement. Second, you need to hyperbolize a bit.

For example, if you want to stress how large the lot you’re selling is, you can further drive the point home by stretching your arms out really wide while saying something like, “The property is so vast (stretch arms out wide) that you can practically build a house with a basketball court and pool there.” Using metaphors with body language works better.

You can shake or nod your head to react to an idea or event, take huge steps to show excitement, pound your fist on the desk and stomp your foot if you need to show a little aggression, and change your facial expressions according to the need.

Of course, not all body language have to be blatant to be effective. Sometimes, subtlety works a lot better, especially if you’re trying to convince someone to buy what you’re selling. Subtle body movements include cupping your palms and leaning forward to show you are serious, crossing your arms over your chest to signify that you’re not understanding the other party’s claims, and inclining your head to one side to reflect wonder.

To illustrate, you will know if the person you are talking to is losing interest in what you’re saying if he starts looking at his watch, shaking his leg, or tapping his foot. Shifty eyes are also an indicator of boredom, though it can also mean that the person is lying in another situation.

Indeed, communication is not just characterized by words. Body movements say a lot about what you are thinking at that particular moment; so if you’re a very transparent person, it’s not likely that you’ll be able to hide anything. It’s a different situation when you’re playing poker though.

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